Why Positive Thinking Isn’t Always Enough: The Mind-Body Connection
The mind-body connection refers to the intricate relationship between our mental states and physical health. This connection is a two-way street: not only can our thoughts and emotions affect our physical well-being, but our physical health can also influence our mental state. Understanding this relationship can help us harness the power of our mind to improve our overall health and well-being. Sometimes these two are not on the same page, so meaningful inner work guides you to restore a sense of balance and foster easeful communication between the two - essentially making their way to being on the same page. It’d be a disservice to talk about the power of the mind without emphasizing the intelligence of the body, so I’ll discuss a common reframing technique I utilize with clients along with discussing the value of facilitating nonverbal emotional processing through your physical body. Both are deserving of time and attention in your approach to self-transformation.
I am an advocate of tuning into their body’s wisdom and intelligence. I also advocate for recognizing the power of your mind and how impactful it is. The famous quote from Henry Ford, “Whether you believe it to be true or not — you’re right” captures its magic. You are a reflection of what you tell yourself repeatedly, so I encourage you to be wise, mindful, and curious about what’s going on beneath the loud voice in your head. The conversations you have in your head and with the world at large matter and interact with your body’s engagement or lack thereof. They both coincide powerfully when it comes to how you’re experiencing life.
With a background in yoga and meditation, I take great pride in nurturing my body daily. I make it a top priority to move my body and rest my body. This looks like engaging in different styles of exercise spanning from cardio, strength training, Pilates, and Yoga to then incorporating meditation, breath work, and self-administered Reiki or energy healing. The combination of yin and yang types of body engagement helps to foster a much-needed balance of getting rid of my excess physical and mental energy as well as practice fostering focus and a lifelong pursuit of stillness or being. Both are required for me to feel a sense of preparedness, clarity, and readiness for the day ahead. I commit to doing this every day - even the weekends, which are often my favorite as I have extra time and space to enjoy what these practices have to offer.
I share this because my experience speaks volumes to what I’m about to explain and share with you based on my work with clients and my own inner work journey. A bulk of the work I’ve done with clients centers around promoting Cognitive Behavioral Techniques and Positive Thinking Psychology. The key notion from this approach surrounds reframing or restructuring your thoughts, conscious and unconscious (as best as you can ;). It’s an incredibly valuable skill to build and practice. Your mindset matters and the power of your mind is a force to be reckoned with.
Often, I’ll share the most common cognitive distortions with clients. These distortions include all-or-nothing thinking, catastrophizing, fortune telling, labeling, ignoring positive/negative filtering, personalization, mind reading, should statements, and emotional reasoning. The amount of insight that’s gained around understanding these common mental threads and patterns of thought is immediate, humbling, and normalizing. I also make sure to reiterate that no one is special - we ALL are subject to these patterns and ways of perceiving the world to feel safe as safety is our most basic and vital human need.
Being able to follow the process coined the 3 C’s, famously known as, Catch It, Check It, Change It provides the much-needed structure for people to start working with these negative or unsupportive thoughts and seeing progress in the little things, especially those momentary pings of self-awareness. To further clarify this 3 step process, let me break each step down and share the definition of each cognitive distortion that I named above.
1. Catch It — This is all about self-observation and noticing what you’re thinking, feeling, and doing. Take inventory of what you’re experiencing and do your best to identify the thoughts connected to the situation you’re in. Consider specific emotions, feelings, general themes, and body cues.
2. Check It — This is when you identify what specific, common cognitive distortion is present. It’s important to question our thoughts to see if it’s flawed, biased, or unrealistic and check the “thinking trap” at play. Not everything you think is rooted in reality and may just be one potential truth that keeps you stuck in unhelpful patterns. It’s great to know what distortion(s) is present while also being mindful of not getting stuck on being “right” to move forward. The main aim is to check it through considering if the thought is minimizing and trivializing in some way to your ability to best respond and feel better about your experience.
Labeling: Making a negative claim about yourself to explain the situation. Quick to judge or blame yourself.
Fortune Telling: Predicting the future often in a negative light. Expecting that a dreaded outcome is extremely likely. This is coupled with a predictive pattern of response and feeling.
All-or-Nothing Thinking: Thinking in black and white. Seeing the extreme versions of looking at and perceiving a situation. No grey area is available to you.
Catastrophizing: Focusing on the worst possible outcome only. Expecting the worst may minimize your experience of pain and limit your experience of positive feelings too.
Ignoring Positives: Recognizing positive experiences as an exception to the rule. Discounting or discrediting positive moments.
Personalizing: Assuming full responsibility for a negative outcome. Self-blame to a detrimental degree. Internalizing or taking things to an excessive degree.
Should Statements: Defining things by what you should or should not do. It’s useful to consider where these should statements are coming from or based on i.e. parents, society, friends, etc. This deflects self-responsibility and deems you powerless more easily.
Emotional Reasoning: Assuming that the more intense the feeling, the greater the actual threat. This hints at a lack of emotional discernment and emotional regulation.
3. Change It — This is where the magic lies! Yes, positive thinking may apply AND it may not. It’s best to build your capacity to see the full spectrum of perspectives available to you surrounding the situation. Consider what might be a more neutral and helpful viewpoint. Make sure you’re seeing things clearly. It isn’t to devalue your original thought, but rather, consider that it’s not the only truth available to you, and perhaps one that keeps things status quo or stagnant, which you’re so desperately striving to change.
This is a fool-proof plan to start rewiring your mind and work the neuroplasticity that’s available to you and in your favor when it comes to achieving more positivity and overhauling deeply ingrained patterns from the beginning and throughout your lifetime. However, this is where I also want to add the wisdom and importance of incorporating body-based practices.
Einstein famously shared, “You cannot solve a problem with the same mind that created it.” I often attract people who like me are overthinkers and worrywarts. We fail to initially grasp the significance of soothing your nervous system and just try to think our way out of a problem. The best bet is often coupling that reflective thinking with some emotional regulation skills, so please remember that the mind-body connection involves engagement with and through your physical body.
The body may not believe your mind without shaking things up accordingly from the inside out. Your body and mind can be on separate pages when it comes to how you feel. So, this is why it’s critical to also learn how to soothe your nervous system and allow emotions to move through you rather than check out or want to jump out of your body any time things get uncomfortable.
It’s about learning and practicing to shift gears to a slower pace while also actively moving our bodies. It’s a balance of knowing when it’s applicable to ramp things up - scream, shout, shake, and dance out your emotions rather than solely talk about them. And when to breathe more deeply, soften the tension, and soothe the nervous system to help the body’s system to relax and restore ease. It’s about exploring and figuring out the dance that best serves your unique blueprint. I’m a big proponent of supporting you to find that balance and involve both your mind and body in ways that best align with your goals and desires. A first important step is to consider what might be missing in the conversations you’re currently having to support positive change and evaluate if there’s room to alter your approach - perhaps less talking, more processing through feeling into your body - not solely thinking your way through.
While verbal communication is a cornerstone of therapy and coaching, integrating more body-based exploration can enhance your understanding and effectiveness. By paying attention to the body's signals, sensations, and reactions, we can uncover deeper insights and foster more profound healing. Encouraging my clients to connect with their physical experiences not only complements our vulnerable discussions but also enriches the therapeutic process, leading to a more holistic approach to personal growth and well-being. Embracing this balance between talking and body-based exploration can empower individuals to achieve a more integrated and authentic sense of self. Reclaim and embrace fostering the mind-body connection that serves you towards becoming a brighter, vibrant you.