Reflections on Patterns & Cycles Towards Transformational Meaning
As I sit here, I experience a feeling I’d describe as the “calm before a storm.” It’s this feeling that something is going to radically shift and of great potentiality, while things also appear strikingly stagnant like flies hopping on still water yet underneath you know something could jump out at you, startle you, and create a massive ripple across the water to hopefully inspire something new. I’m not exactly sure what that new will look like but I’m having faith it’ll all work out and land appropriately. I’m having faith in myself coming out the other side better than before as well as for my loved ones. There’s a transformation happening on deep levels. I can feel the depths of processing happening in my sleep as it feels so potent, restless, yet restful in a paradoxical yet powerful way. Still waters run deep, and things feel active and alive beneath the surface of my conscious proceedings. It’s a true testament to the many hours spent examining my inner workings.
What this is illuminating is the cyclical nature of all things and all life, just like the planet and its many beautiful inhabitants. Nature has its cycles and so do we through how we experience patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that shape our experiences. Some patterns are more desirable than others, and some are so second nature we don’t even dare to question them as it’s just who we are. For example, if you’re like me, you may anxiously worry about other people’s perceptions of you without flinching a muscle. It just happens - I see myself playing out this pattern and walking this grooved, all too familiar, neuro-pathway.
There’s a lot of talk and evidence in favor of building positive cycles or rather, healthy habits. This is founded on the power of small steps and building intrinsic motivation strong enough to maintain a commitment to the non-linear path of change and growth. What I’d like to make room to consider is how as individuals we are all part of greater cycles and play a part in some larger whole. Whether someone interprets that “larger than them” as God, a Higher Power or Plan, The Divine, The Universe, Source/Creator, One’s Ancestral Lineage, or simply as another human being, or something of the like, it’s pointing to the same notion of a larger force that our individual cycles feed or are fed by. In all honesty, there’s so much we do not know or are not aware of about ourselves when you think about how the conscious mind constitutes only 3-5% of our mind. So, it can feel quite daunting to grapple with one’s place in this greater world and the larger invisible sometimes unfathomable cycles.
Orienting to the notion of partaking in cycles and patterns, small and large, can initially inspire existential dread and anxiety. However, it may also hopefully move us toward greater meaning, what matters most, and a desired reality. For example, I’m noticing this week I’m feeling a bit slow, in the clouds, tired, and “in process” of which I’m not entirely sure. I have been here before and seen how this unknown place and unsettling feeling can propel me into new beginnings and visionary ideas best aligned to what is calling. It’s a calling from underneath the surface, something I’m not consciously aware of, and encouraging the expansive stretching of my wings of faith. It’s quite frightening and illuminating - an uncomfortable place to sit - however, I am confident it’ll push me into growth. In this moment, I’m reminded of feeling most alive recently in Puerto Rico, enveloped by the lushness, vitality, and greenery of one of the greatest cycles of all, Mother Nature.
Cycles bring up this funny paradox where this idea of creating your reality and being the Captain of your Soul, Master of Your Fate can meet the forces of a greater cycle that may propel another agenda for your life. One’s coping with the unknowns with “It’s meant to be” is met with a prayer of “So it is” in service to something greater than you. The reality is we are happier if we get out of our own way and make it about contribution, service, and meaning rather than the limitations of linear thinking and measures of success or productivity, which I admittedly resort to. This thinking pattern caps potential and closes the gap to the element of surprise. The fear of being in a void of emptiness or unknown proceedings weighs heavy, so the mind initially believes it’s better to problem-solve to death rather than to allow a larger cycle to push and pull you along as they may.
Sometimes being “in process” mode can feel stagnant and present when things aren’t going ahead as planned. There may be another purpose or meaning on your journey. Instead of it being a linear-minded pursuit where 1 + 1 = 2, wisdom or insight must be gained first while conquering the next hurdle on your path. So, I encourage you to get familiar with your “in process” state on an emotional, mental, and behavioral level. Get to know it and learn to be okay with it and its familiar patterns.
Ask yourself: What tends to surface when you start to experience slowness or a perceived failing in your life journey? It can be easy to resist and try to push even harder, and sometimes that might be the answer. However, I also give you room and permission to explore another way. A pathway connected to embracing a slower pace of life, disconnecting from the noise i.e. social media or things that don’t truly matter, simplifying your daily routine, cleaning, re-organizing, and the like. Anything that helps to create the space within and around you for clarity to surface because that feeling of hitting a stalemate, plateau, or demotivation is an opportunity for pattern recognition and a deep dive of self-discovery.
There’s value in understanding how you’ll default respond to these moments and then take it upon yourself to choose differently. Instead of beating yourself up, take extra time for your wellness and perhaps challenge yourself in a different way rather than the only way your mind will let you as it obsesses over the next solution or achievement. The ability to be flexible and adaptable are much-needed qualities for success in overcoming challenges. These strengths are fostered as pattern recognition is enhanced and new pathways start to be created.
…A WEEK LATER…
As I tune in with where I’m at in my pattern and cycle of “being in process” perhaps within some larger cycle, I want to share further insights.
Just a week later, I am feeling so much better; much lighter and brighter from the inside out. I’m about to get my moon cycle, another cycle that points me into specific emotional and psychological states within myself that symbolize and promote greater healing, rebirth, and release. It’s funny how my self-reflections from a week ago land quite differently now. Whenever I feel low, I often forget how when I’m on the other side about how much lighter I’ll feel. On the other side of a version of hard or darkness, a greater capacity for light is found. It’s quite incredible how things are always shifting, completing, progressing, and beginning, again and again. The idea of cycles is similar to the notion of honoring the process and focusing on the steps that come together to create a whole in one’s transformational journey.
In general, change is not a linear journey and my advice to you when examining your cycles and patterns to promote positive change in your life is don’t expect it to be linear. The experience can find greater meaning that way. The change journey’s trajectory is an opportunity to explore the many shades of grey that capture this human experience. Remember that you’re also a piece of a greater cycle, often unknown or unseen, towards a version of something better. It may not appear in favor of your individual cycle but rather intercept another’s cycle in service of a larger or greater cycle’s pursuits. Until it all becomes intertwined toward some greater purpose and meaning inaccessible to the naked eye firsthand, my hope and prayer is you may feel in awe of the divine orchestration.